Help Me Find it.....

"In His grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well.  So if God has given you the ability to prophesy, speak out with as much faith as God has give you.  If your gift is serving others, serve them well.  If you are a teacher, teach well.  If your gift is to encourage others, be encouraging.  If it is giving, give generously.  And if you have the gift of showing kindness to others, do it gladly."               -Romans 12:6-8

Last fall I started a study on spiritual gifts.  I'm not gonna lie and say I was surprised by what it showed me my top spiritual gift was.  I've always known compassion was what mine was.  I'm not saying that to sound full of myself.  I actually didn't know that was mine because I thought I showed compassion to everyone, ect.  It has always stood out to me because of the 'bad' that tends to come with having it be up there in your list.  I can tell you word for word almost about all the times someone has hurt me.  And not because I'm holding a grudge, and not because whoever wronged me was so bad.  It's because hurtful words and actions have always cut me way too deep.  Deeper than most I would say.  My heart hurts just a little bit longer, it feels for those that most wouldn't even give a thought to, and it weeps for everything Jesus would weep for a little bit harder. 

The past few months I have honestly been wondering, "Why me Lord? Why do I have to carry this burden?"  Because honestly sometimes it is a burden.  To lay it all out there, I have often wondered why I find myself praying for those who have done some awful things to Gods people.  My heart aches badly for those who do things that are not in God's will.  And sometimes, I don't want to feel sorry for them, but it's written in my heart. It's written in my heart that God still loves them, and weeps at what the world has come to.  So I've been asking a lot, "why me?" 

Very recently a dear friend sent a text message to me telling me to read Romans 12-14.  And that's where I got the above verse from.  And that's when it all came rushing in like a flood:

God gave ME this gift.  He gave it to ME for a reason.  A reason I won't know until I accept that I'm supposed to have it.  I'm supposed to feel a little harder and stronger.  I'm supposed to weep a little bit harder and longer.  Those people who I don't want to feel for and do, I'm supposed to feel that way towards them because it leads me to my knees in prayer for their souls.  Because if I don't, who will? I'm part of the body of Christ.  And in the body of Christ, every part is vital. 

So this is a challenge friends.  Whatever God may have called you to do or be, do it for Him.  Give it to Him, all of it.  Even if you can't understand why He made you that way, I promise you He did it for a reason and you just don't know it yet.  And honestly you might not know why until you get to Heaven.  But I plan to open up my gift and let it soar.  Whatever He wants to do with it I'm gonna let Him.  I'm gonna stop fighting it and just let it be. 

A few months ago while coming back from Willmar a song came on the radio and I remember falling in love with it.  I wanted to remember it so badly but of course I forgot and hadn't heard it since.  The message was exactly what I wanted for my life right now.  My cry out to the Lord.  Well guys, seriously when I started writing this that song came on the radio.  God is so good!! Brings tears to my eyes every time I listen.... enjoy :)

A must read for us Christains living in today's world

My heart has been so very heavy the last few weeks.  Things I've seen on the internet and Facebook have been weighing heavily on my mind.  Making me start to wonder how on earth I am going to be able to raise Godly children in such an ungodly world.  I am so not one to talk politics on social media sites because frankly, even friends and family can be so cruel when someone has a different belief than they do.  Most of the time it's completely fine for them to plaster their opinion all over Facebook and yet I know if I put up a belief of mine I would be condemn and ridiculed.  I would be beaten down to the ground with their words and hateful speech of a God I so dearly love.  There would be words twisted, books twisted and everything in between.  If you know me, you know where I stand on hot topics of the world.  If you know me, you know I'm not a judge, I'm not a fighter. 

As I got on Facebook this afternoon, yet again my heart got heavy.  Facebook can be such a fun thing and lately it's become such a not fun thing.  I've seen fights and hurtful words being spread around on all sides of arguments in today's world.  I've also noticed most of the time, it's a very one sided fight.  I guarantee you if you go on your Facebook you will clearly see which side of a certain fight is the only side being shared around.  I started to pray and dig into what God wants from us who love Him so dearly.  It breaks His heart to see so much hate and anger and sin going around.  And that's how I came to the book of Jude.  I will be honest I have never read it before today.  It has brought tears to my eyes this afternoon.  It is a short book in the bible, and frankly I cannot just choose one verse of it to share because it is all way to good, and something us Christians living in todays world need to be reminded of.  Therefore I am going to re-type it here so you don't even have to lift a finger to search for it.  If you have a bible I encourage you to go grab it and look it up.  I have highlighted most of the end of the book.  The end is things us Christians need to be doing to stand up for our faith and our God. 

"I am writing to all who have been called by God the Father, who loves you and keeps you safe in the care of Jesus Christ. May God give you more and more mercy, peace, and love.

Dear friends, I have been eagerly planning to write to you about the salvation we share.  But now I find that I must write about something else, urging you to DEFEND the faith that God has entrusted once for all time to His holy people.  I say this because some ungodly people have wormed their way into your churches, saying God's marvelous grace allows us to live immoral lives.  The condemnation of such people was recorded long ago, for they have denied our only Master and Lord, Jesus Christ.  

So I want to remind you, though you already know these things, that Jesus first rescued the nation of Israel from Eygpt, but later He destroyed those who did not remain faithful.  And I remind you of the angels who did not stay within the limits of authority God gave them but left the place where they belonged.  God has kept them securely chained in the prisions of darkness, waiting for the great day of judgement.  And don't forget Sodom and Gomorrah and their neighboring towns, which were filled with immorality and every kind of sexual perversion.  Those cities were destroyed by fire and serve as a warning of eternal fire and God's judgement.

In the same way, these people - who claim authority from their dreams - live immoral lives, defy authority, and scoff at the supernatural beings.  But even Michael, one of the mightiest angels, did not dare accuse the devil of blasphemy, but simply said, "The Lord rebuke you!" (This took place when Michael was arguing with the devil about Moses' body).  But these people scoff at things they do not understand.  Like unthinking animals, they do whatever their instincts tell them, and so they bring about their own destruction.  What sorrow awaits them! For they follow in the footsteps of Cain who killed his brother.  Like Balaam, they deceive people for money.  And like Korah, they perish in their rebeillion.

When these people eat with you in your fellowship meals commemorating the Lord's love, they are like dangerous reefs that can shipwreck you.  They are like shameless shepherds who care only for themselves.  They are like clouds blowing over the land without giving any rain.  They are like trees in the autumn that are doubly dead, for they bear no fruit and have been pulled up by the roots.  They are like wild waves of the sea, churning up the foam of their shameful deeds.  They are like wandering starts, doomed forever to blackest darkness.

Enoch, who lived in the 7th generation of Adam, prophesied about these people.  He said, "Listen! The Lord is coming with countless thousands of his holy ones to execute judgement on the people of the world.  He will convict every person of all the ungodly things they have done and for all the insults that ungodly sinners have spoken against him.

These people are grumblers and complainers, living only to satisfy their desires.  They brag loudly about themselves, and they flatter others to get what they want. 

But you, dear friends must remember what the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ said.  They told you that in the last times there would be scoffers whose purpose in life is to satisfy their ungodly desires.  These people are the ones who are creating divisions among you.  They follow their natural instincts because they do not have God's spirit in them.

But you, dear friends, must build each other up in your most holy faith, pray in the power of the Holy Spirit, and await the mercy our Lord Jesus Christ, who will bring you eternal life.  In this way, you will keep yourselves safe in God's love.

And you must show mercy to those whose faith is wavering.  Rescue others by snatching them from the flames of judgement. Show mercy to still others, but do so with great caution, hating the sings that contaminate their lives.

Now all glory to God, who is able to keep you from falling away and will bring you with great joy into his glorious presence without a single fault.  All glory to him who alone is God, our Savior through Jesus Christ our Lord.  All glory, majesty, power, and authority are his before all time, and in the present and beyond all time! Amen!"
-Jude NLT

 

Taking a plunge into a little bit of the unknown

With much nerves and excitement I'm writing this post.  It is truly amazing looking back over the past few months and seeing how God has slowly been nudging me to make a change.  Eventually sometimes He does have to start screaming in my ear but this time it just took a series of serious nudges before I said "Ok Ok. If this is what you want for our family I will take the step out of my box and do it."

You see many many months ago I was talking to a dear friend who was doing Mary Kay.  I remember having multiple conversations with her about the company and her trying to convince me I could do it.  Pretty sure I laughed in her face every time she said that but God bless her heart for thinking I could be successful at it.  If you know me at all, you know I barely wear make up period.  A little eye liner and a little mascara and I'm good to go. ;) That was nudge number one. (And no this doesn't end with me becoming a Mary Kay Consultant.)

Then this winter I started feeling like I was supposed to be doing something on top of my photography business.  I wasn't sure if God was trying to tell me to go back to a part/full time job (which I really didn't want to do) or what exactly the desire was.  Trav and I talked about what we thought I should be doing, if I should be looking for part time evening work ect.  I think we did this on and off again for a few months.  Neither of us really wanted me to start working again like that but we were still feeling like there was something I was supposed to be looking into, we just couldn't pin point what. 

Finally last Thursday evening I went to a sweet friend's house for her Lia Sophia party.  Pretty much just went to see her beautiful face and eat her delicious food ;).  On the drive home I started feeling that same nudge again.  There was something I was missing and something I should be doing.  The next day I started looking at all the different companies like Lia Sophia.  You know the ones where you are your own boss and have parties in peoples homes?  I knew Mary Kay wasn't my thing and I knew Lia Sophia wasn't my thing.  I'm a girlie girlie but not when it comes to jewelry and make-up.  I knew I wouldn't succeed in that venture.  Then Pampered Chef came to my mind.  I began to think of the amazing products I currently have in my kitchen and how much I love them.  I thought about the party I went to last Spring and how much fun it was to sit around with my girlfriends, eat some yummy food, and look at some amazingly tempting products I wanted in my kitchen.  So what was the next step? I prayed and prayed and prayed all day off and on about it.  When Trav got home from work we talked about it and prayed some more.  Saturday I emailed a gal from Pampered Chef wanting more information on how it all works and prayed some more.  During this time I talked to a few girlfriends and of course mom and got their take.  All of them were so encouraging and positive in thinking I could do it. 

Last night Carla called me back.  We talked for over 45 minutes about it and I got all the details.  Honestly so much less scary than I thought it would be and she seems like such an encourager that it gave me the confidence I was seeking.  But of course what did I need? Another night to sleep on it and pray some more.  Big decisions are a difficult thing for me.  I like to know what I'm doing is the right choice for me and my family and of course know it is something God wants for us.

Well ladies and gentlemen, this morning I officially emailed Carla and said let's do this!!  I am so excited for all that it could and will bring to our family!! I am so excited for all the people I am going to get to meet in the next few months.  I still have to 'officially' get everything set up but within the next few days that will all be done.  :)

I'm not going to lie though friends, I am going to need my family and friends support in this.  If not by hosting a cooking or catalog show (which I so hope you will be doing because they literally are so much fun!), but by praying for me on this new adventure.  Not only will it get me out of the house a few times a month (which is something all us mommas need sometimes), not only will it hopefully bring in some extra cash for our family, not only will it help me meet more people to hopefully become some of my photography clients, but I also hope it will help me bring the love of Jesus to everyone I meet.  When I am at someone's home who I don't know, I want them to be able to see Jesus in me.  Because that's the ultimate goal for all of our lives isn't it? :)

Have a wonderful week and I will be talking to a lot of you very soon about a grand opening party :)

The Devil Isn't Allowed Here....

In the past few weeks I have started a few different studies beyond my Jesus Calling morning devotional.  One of which is a study that is truly hitting me in the heart and slowly but seriously letting Jesus work on it and mold me more into what He wants for me to be.  The on-line study is through Proverbs 31 and is on the book by Karen Ehman called "Let. It. Go".  A wonderful book about letting go of control over you life and letting God take the reins.  Simply amazing but that isn't truly what I want to share with you today.

There is someone who tries to enter my life every time I go deeper into my relationship with Jesus.  Someone who is so completely jealous of my relationship with Him.  Someone who wants my attention to be on him and him alone.  This person appears every time I open up my heart to my Savior and say, "Lord change me.  Change my heart.  Make it what you want it to be.  Come into my heart and soul and clear out the junk."  Every single time I say those words, there is someone who loves all the junk he sees in my heart and will do and say anything to get me to hold tight to all the junk I so badly want to throw away.  This person isn't welcome in my home.  He is not welcome in my heart.  He is not welcome in my life.  Yet he is so sly and good at what he does that it is so easy to without knowing it open up a window and letting him come crash on the couch for awhile.  If you haven't guessed it by now, his name is the devil.

You would think that after putting my trust in the Lord for so many years and having this happen every time that I would be on the look out and see it coming.  But friends, I never see it coming.  It catches me off guard almost every single time.  That's how the devil works, when he sees an opportunity he is going to take it.  He is so clever that whatever God is laying on my heart in that weeks study to change, the devil usually attacks that the hardest.  I'm going to be completely transparent with you, this week it was this very verse:

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” ~ Proverbs 15:1

I get teary-eyed just thinking about it guys.  Anger is such an easy thing to give into as human beings.  Hurtful words sometimes can come flying out of your mouth before a second thought is even given.  Hurtful words can cut and cut deep.  And ladies.... the devil knows.  He knows how easily as human beings we can fall into anger and everything that follows it.  He knows that relationships are the easiest thing to go after, and the easiest thing to hurt those relationships is in fact anger.  So let me tell you, he has been working hard to enter this home and make a boom.  Every day there has been something new he has used to try to stir up anger and harsh words in this home.  And if I'm being really honest, there are a few times he succeeded. And as much as that makes my heart hurt, I'm so very thankful I can bring those moments to Jesus, lay them down at His feet and not carry that burden and start fresh again.

Therefore I want to take this time to publicly declare that the devil is NOT welcome in my home.  He is NOT welcome near my family.  He is NOT welcome to try and break up my relationships.  He is NOT welcome to slip through the window unnoticed and crash on my couch.  I am a daughter of the King and that's where my heart belongs.  Every time he tries to bring this family down, all it does is bring us to our knees and cry out for Jesus.  Every time he pushes us to the limits, all it does is make us work harder to become more and more like Jesus.  We aren't perfect and we will mess up but boy do we have a Savior that loves us, holds us in His arms, and let us know it's all going to be ok. 

As always I'm going to try and keep my eyes better pealed for ways the devil is going to try and attack.  I challenge you all to do the same.  Try hard to block him before he even tries to knock on the door.  Every time you draw closer to Jesus, I promise friends he will try to bring you back his way.  Don't let him.  Cling tight to our Lord's hand and His promises.  I promise He will see you through whatever the devil tries to throw at you......

~Chrissy

How I lost 50lbs in 6 weeks...

Naw, I really didn't but I got your attention didn't I?? Slap a celebrity's picture and that title on any magazine and you are guaranteed to sell millions of them.  Why is it as a society we are so obsessed with weight? Most importantly how to lose it in the shortest amount of time. Seems women and even some men all over the globe are all in this big race with each other in who can get the skinniest the fastest.  Doesn't matter how you lose it as long as you get skinny quick.  Doesn't matter if it's healthy or unhealthy.  Society really doesn't care as long as you do it.  We call healthy men and women fat and yet we call ultra skinny gorgeous.  It's really no wonder why so many teenager girls struggle with their weight.  Moms of all kinds are counting calories in every bite, saying any kind of dessert is evil and obsessing over whether or not they got enough exercise in that day.  Now don't get me wrong, watching what you put into your body is extremely important but should we be obsessing over every little bite? This is something that the past several months has been weighing heavily on my heart.  Something that God has been whispering into my ear since this summer.  Something He has been calling me to write about but that I just couldn't seem to get the strength to type out.  Weight is such a sensitive issue no matter who you are.  I guarantee the most confident woman still has issues about their own body and something they would like to see changed.  It's such a sensitive issue that I couldn't figure out why in the word God would want me to write about it, but here we go anyway.  This is my journey.....

A few months ago while at the check out counter at Target I noticed this little dandy of an image:

Notice that lovely title: How I got thin fast..... I stared at it for awhile kinda laughed inside and then got really sad.  It made me think back to the past summer and how awful I felt about myself for not losing the baby weight from Maci fast.  It made me think about all the beautiful women out there who are reading it and thinking that that's how it is supposed to be.  That once you have a baby you should be able to just work off that weight in a hurry.  The reality is folks, that's not how it works nor how it should be.  Whether you just had a baby or just aren't as thin as you used to be, the weight took time to gain.  As much as you think it did, you did not just wake up one morning 10, 20 or 30 lbs heavier than you once were.  If it took time to gain the weight it will take time to come off plain and simple.  I didn't fully understand or even want to believe that until this past spring/summer.

As a teenager I don't feel I ever had this huge hang up about my weight.  I wasn't the skinniest girl in school but I certainly wasn't the biggest either.  I would say I was pretty much average.  My mother helped me in so many ways she doesn't even know.  Eating healthy was always her goal, eating the right portions, and she's makes sure to get adequate exercise.  I never saw my mother stand in front of the mirror and call herself fat.  I never saw her refuse a bite of a brownie for fear of the calories.  I know for a fact behind close doors she probably had those little insecurities like every other woman does but I thank her so much for never showing that side to her.  I 100% give credit to her for not having severe weight fears most of my life.  I had things I wanted changed about myself here and there but nothing that made me go on crazy diets.  That is until I had a baby...

The first 3 months of my pregnancy were the hardest healthwise.  I lost a total of 20 lbs in those months but by all means it was not healthy.  I couldn't keep anything down and even though I got lots of 'you look great' it didn't make me feel good about how I looked.  For goodness sakes all I could eat was crackers!  Not the funnest part of being able to 'eat for two'.  In the next 6 months I gained 40-45 lbs.  More like 60 lbs if you include what I gained back from being so sick.  That's a lot of weight for a girl to gain but I didn't think twice about it because I was gonna have a little girl.

Once I had Maci I didn't step on the scale until I had to at the doctors.  I didn't want to know what it was because frankly, I didn't want to worry about it.  I just had the most beautiful baby girl I had ever seen and that's all I wanted to focus on.  2 weeks after I had her I squeezed my big old butt into my 'skinny jeans'.  Yea they fit but they were not comfortable in the least.  But yes I wanted to be able to tell my girlfriends at 2 weeks post baby I fit into them.  Looking back that was a very stupid reason for wanting to fit into them but hey I'm human.

3/4 months after I had Maci was when I hit my lowest.  I was breastfeeding and I truly believe my body hangs onto the weight while doing it.  It's not a weight-loss plan for me.  I was at my parents and they were having some friends over to meet their new granddaughter.  Holding Maci I walked into the kitchen to see what everyone was talking about.  An old friend of my parents came up to me and said, "My you have put on weight!" Not even thinking for a second he could possibly talking to me I said, "Who me? Or Maci?" His response: "Well you of course!" The rest of it all goes downhill from there.  I try to tell him I just had a baby, he asks how old she is.... I say almost 4 months....He says then I didn't just have her...ect.  Probably the most painful emotional experience I've been through in a very long time.  In all my 24 years of being on this earth I had never felt bad about myself.  I never saw myself as this fat overweight person.  I never had someone say such a hurtful thing to my face.  Instead of standing strong and proud, I gave into the doubt the Devil placed into my mind and let those thoughts stay there.  Not only that night did I change into a bulky tummy hiding shirt, but I gave into the temptation of looking into the mirror and seeing ugly.

For most of the summer I hated my body.  Hated every detail about it.  Felt like the fattest girl ever.  Tried to work out and got frustrated when it didn't work out.  Got sucked into all the conversations women have of what they hate about themselves.  I felt awful.  I know my hubby got so sick of me saying how gross I was.  Trust me he told me.  And then one bright and shiny day God spoke to me as I was rocking Maci.  And this is pretty much what He showed me:

(Just saw this image on Pinterest today, which gave me the courage to write)

I saw Maci growing up watching every move her momma makes.  Watching her momma hate the skin she is in.  Watching her mama criticize every detail God created on her.  Watch her momma have some pretty dang low self worth.  It. Broke. My. Heart.  I don't want that for my baby girl.  Whether I'm overweight or not doesn't matter.  What matters is what SHE thinks of herself and if she watches me act like this? Lord what am I doing to her.  

I tell you what ladies and gentlemen, that's some pretty intense powerful stuff He laid out in front of me.  Is it hard to look inside yourself and see all that? Of course.  No one wants to think they are setting their kids up for failure.  But if we aren't acting, thinking, doing all we want them to do...then how in the world are they going to grow up to have some awesome self confidence.  How are they going to think good about themselves.  If they see momma not loving her body, how is that little angel gonna be able to feel good about her own? 

God created us in His image and He thinks we are beautiful no matter what we look like.  He doesn't care if society sees us as overweight, underweight or perfect.  What matters is how He sees us.  So mamas who just had those beautiful babies, it's ok to still have baby weight.  It's ok if it takes you awhile to lose it, or if you don't.  Ladies and gentlemen who think they are overweight, it's ok to take your time to get where you want to be.  Be healthy.  As long as you are healthy and feel good about yourself that's all that matters.  You are perfect in God's sight so forget the rest of the world.  It's not easy but once you let your insecurities go about how you look you will feel amazing. God will help take that burden off of you and you. will. be. free.  

After about 10/11 months I got to my pre-baby weight.  Did it feel good of course.  Am I back to my size 6 that I was when I got married? Heck no.  But that's ok because in God's eyes I'm beautiful.  I'm ok in my own skin now and it feels amazing.  If anyone were to call me fat now, I'm 90% sure I could look at them and tell them I don't think so.  I'm right where I'm supposed to be.  :)

"You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you"

Song of Solomon 4:7 

Oh how He....

Saw this beautiful image on pinterest yesterday morning.  That little girl looks so happy and full of life.  So perfect in the eyes of that daddy kissing and loving on her.  When I first saw it I thought oh how cute! Didn't really think too much of the words written so carefully below the picture itself.  I feel like we all do that more times than not.  See such beautiful thoughts that are clearly from God and we just tend to overlook them.  Until Jesus decides we need to remember them and think of them in a much bigger way.....

Later on in the afternoon, me and my adorable newly 1 year old baby girl were in the kitchen playing and goofing around.  For those of you who don't know Maci, she has such an infectious laugh and smile.  She lights up the room with her big beautiful grin and I promise I'm not just being biased.  ;)

So here we are sitting on the kitchen floor, why I have no clue...I was in the process of making some homemade bread and the kitchen is Maci's most favorite place to be (especially if mom is in there trying to get something done).  I bet for about 10 minutes or more we spent playing with this silly pink doll blanket.  I would put it on my head, she would take it off and I would yell "BOO!", she would giggle, give it back to me and the process would start all over again.  After a few minutes Maci got the hang of it and decided she wanted to be the 'hider'. 

And when she would take the blanket off her face she would give you that sweet sweet smile and then giggle away.  These are the moments I will remember when she is grown up and off on her own, but during this particular  moment the Lord decided He needed to tell me something and show me something I needed to see to fully grasp His love...

I've always known that God loves me and He created me in His image but for one that grew up in the church that tends to just get lost in the every day life we have here on earth.  We know He loves us but sometimes it doesn't feel like it. Therefore as I was sitting there looking at this beautiful perfect child in my eyes, and just feeling my heart swell up as I watched her sweet face full of joy, my thoughts went back to that first image.  The image I saw on Pinterest.  I sat there staring at Maci and thought, "My God, my loving and awesome God, you love me more than this? You love me even more than I love my own daughter don't You?  You see me as this giggly beautiful child don't You? You will never leave me.  You will never stop loving me like I will never stop loving her will You?"  Now friends, it may seem like such a "Sunday School" answer.  It may seem like something that is such a practical thought that you are taught right away as a Christian, but friends, do you fully feel every ounce that is in that promise?  If you have children think of how much you love your kids and think of how much happiness they bring you....think of how even when they mess up or are 'naughty', how much you still love them.  It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about that kind of love.  That kind of powerful love.  He watches us everyday just as I watch Maci play and giggle.  When He watches us giggling and laughing we bring a smile to His face.  He hurts when we hurt and oh how He rejoices when we rejoice. 

Oh how He loves us...oh how He loves us.....Oh how He LOVES us.......

It's a beautiful thing....we may not always feel like we deserve it....but that doesn't stop Him.  His love is far more powerful than we could ever imagine.  Can you feel it? I sure hope you can because it is there far more than we realize it......

Leaps of Faith

January 2, 2013.....2013.....crazy how time flies.  Still to this very day I feel like the year 2000 was just a couple years ago. When in reality it has now been over a decade ago.  It is true as you grow older time seems to go faster and faster.  I don't know if I ever really believed that saying until we had our Maci. 

Last year I remember at this time I was very big and pregnant.  We were just mere weeks away from the arrival of our daughter and we didn't know where the past 9 months had gone.  I returned to work on the 2nd knowing that I only had a few more weeks left of getting up and going to work everyday.  While on one hand I was so excited to be able to spend all that time at home and watch my baby grow and change everyday, on the other I was scared out of my mind.  Of course the decision to quit my steady income job had been a careful thought out and prayed one, Trav and I still felt like we were taking such a huge leap of faith.  We had taken little baby steps here and there that God told us to do but this one was the biggest one He had ever called us to do.  Where would that extra money come from?? Would our bills always get paid on time?? What about the extra little human that would be depending on us for every little thing she needed?? What about food to feed ourselves?? What about things we would want to buy or even need to buy?? There were so many unanswered questions and neither Trav nor I would ever really speak them out loud.  We just kept telling each other that God has our back and no matter what we would make it. 

Now did I deep down in my heart and soul believe this with 100% certainty?? If I'm being honest, probably not so much.  I deep down thought that after about 10 weeks I would have to find at least a part time job to help pay the bills.  I thought our savings account would be drained within a few months and that would be the end of it and we would look like the idiots.  But I just kept praying every day, "God take care of us...please don't let us fail". 

Well guess what folks?!? In just 2 short weeks we will have been living on Trav's small income for 1 whole year! When I looked back at the past year and saw all that God has done for our family I was so amazed.  All the little things that happened were worked into the whole scheme of things.  One of the biggest blessings that I will never forget is my dear sweet co-workers at West Elementary throwing me a diaper shower just a week before I had Maci.  You really don't think it sounds like a big deal but guess what?? We didn't need to buy diapers for 6 whole months!!! God is so good to have placed those sweet women in our lives.  There were so many other little things that happened here and there that were just when we needed them.  And to be honest there was no other way to explain them except God things. 

The moral of this post to start the new year is that when you take those leaps of faith, no matter how big or small, God has your back.  He will take care of you, He will be there for you, He will comfort you when you need Him.  He will NEVER leave you.  Yes we had our struggles but God helped us through so much.  Don't be scared this next year to take that leap of faith He is calling you too....I promise you it will be so worth it! :)

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11


~Chrissy