You have 3 options ladies.....

Someone calls you out on something you did.  Whether you agree with them or disagree with them isn't the problem.  The problem is you have 3 options to choose from as your response.  You can either:

A: Let your inner mean girl come out- They are being ridiculous.  Are they seriously making a bigger deal out of this than it really is.  How dare they do this to you.  They have no reason to be upset nor do they have a right to talk to you this way.

B: Stuff it all down inside and let the inside chatter take over- They obviously think you are so stupid.  They can't believe how you would dare do that so obviously they will never forgive you or want to talk to you ever again.  I'm sure they will go around and tell everyone and their dog about what I did.  How could I have been so stupid? They think I'm so immature and the worst type of person.

C: Apologize for what you did to offend or upset them and move on- Most of the time this is the least likely one we will resort to.  As woman we are driven by emotions and I would bet 99.9% off the time it is hard to not react based upon our emotions. We let the emotions flow and very rarely stop and take a second to think over how we are going to react. It's in our nature.  It's in our make up. But that doesn't mean we can't change how we react.  It doesn't mean we can't start trying to keep our God given emotions in check. 

This morning I had someone let me know I had done something they didn't like very much.  I had these very 3 options right in front of my face.  And since just last week I had finished the book Unglued By Lysa TerKeurst these 3 options were fresh in my mind.  This time God put it pretty quick in my mind that I had no right or reason to let my inner mean girl come out.  I may have not had the same opinion in this situation but this person had every right to feel the way they did.  So I was left with the last 2 options......

I'll be honest folks, I am so terribly bad with inside chatter.  There have been so many times I come home from somewhere and think, "Why did I say that?? Why did I do that?? They all think I'm a moron...." and the list goes on......  So when I read chapter 10 in Lysa's book about inside chatter it shook me up inside.  It brought into the light how extremely unhealthy this is and now I try, key word try to stop the inside chatter right away.

This morning was no different.  The first option just plainly wasn't a option.  The second one though I really had to fight off.  I cried to my sweet husband telling him this person is so mad at me now and it will probably be awkward the next time we see them....and how could I ever talk to them again?? If they don't respond to my apology it means they hate me and think I'm so incredibly stupid for doing what I did.  Travis of course flat out said, "Chrissy none of that is true and if they are mad they will get over it.  They will not be mad forever." Yep there was my stop sign to quiet the inside chatter.  This poor person didn't actually physically say anything I was rambling on about.  I hung up with the hubby and remembered chapter 10 in Lysa's book.  I had apologized for making a stupid decision and that was that.  I needed to just move on and not sit and listen to the devil feed me lies.  Because frankly I know that was what he was doing.  He was making me feed into all the insecurities I have about myself.  

I could have dwelt on this small thing literally all day.  I could have felt stupid all day.  I could have wondered if they were over it all day.  But instead I tried my darnedest to do option 3.  Wasn't easy and it probably won't ever be an easy option but with God's help I can do anything....of that I am sure... 

6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

He will provide.....

25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[a]?

28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Matthew 6:25-34

Worrying is probably my worst trait.  I worry over everything.  Ask my husband any time and he will tell you that he has to tell me all the time to not worry so much.  It can be something as little as a sentence I said to someone all the way to how we are going to afford a bill.  Sometimes I even make myself sick over worrying over a situation and most of the time my worry was all for nothing. I've seen the verse above multiple times.  I've heard friends tell stores all the time about how God has provided for their every need.  How when they aren't sure how something is going to work out God finds a way to wow them. But honestly I still have chosen to worry, until we got into the current situation we are in....

Ever since the day God blessed us with Trav's new job I have been committed to not worry so much.  Is the house gonna sell? I know it will, in its own time...I'm so not worried.  How are we going to afford a place for Trav to sleep and extra gas?? Haven't been worried at all...just knew somehow it would work out.  How are we going to survive living apart? We just will, it will be hard but we will make it through.  Right now we have so much we could be worrying about and for some reason we just aren't.  And let me tell you, God is showing up in a HUGE way.  

The very first month Trav was in Canby I had 8, yes 8 cooking shows in 4 weeks.  Didn't know why God was throwing all this work my way when I didn't have a spouse to help with Maci but I did it anyway.  The check from those 8 shows covered Trav's hotel and then some for the 2nd month he would be there.  Praise GOD!! Had a super rough week and felt pretty alone....God used one of my good friends to send me some cheer and let me know she is there for me.  Praise GOD! We got word that after our house sells, we will be getting the go ahead to be able to purchase a house. Praise GOD! Our furnace needed a part replaced this past weekend, my Pampered Chef paycheck again covered the bill and then some.  Praise GOD! Trav's payment to have the hotel for another month is due in a week, today he found out he will barely be there for the month of December due to being in SD and the cities for training and conferences. Therefore he won't be needing it in December.  Praise GOD!!! 

In just 7 weeks God has provided for us in ways we weren't sure how we would make it work.  Ever since I stopped the worrying over everything, He has blessed me more than I could imagine.  He has shown me that I can trust Him. That He has my back.  That He will provide for my every need.  For my families every need.  

So this Thanksgiving I'm praising God for this crazy life He has me in right now. There are times its hard and sometimes down right sucks but He is holding us through it.  He is teaches us to lean on Him no matter what.  He is showing us He will provide for our every need.....  

This Way Child....

When we hear God's voice, sometimes it's so easy to say "Nope.  I'm not doing that." Or "I'm not doing it that way. I'm gonna do it my way." Or we start talking to others about what God has called us to do and they have an opinion on what we should do.  9 times out of 10 the way we think is best or the way others think is best is the easy way.  God's way is usually the harder way.  God's way usually involves challenges and of course lessons.  His way forces us to look deep into ourselves and find our strength in Him.  And in the end when we look back, almost 100% of the time, we see that overall His way was the better way. It may have not been the easier way but it was the better path to go.

When Travis and I first started this journey we are on, everything went crazy fast now looking back at it.  We didn't expect everything to go so quickly.  We didn't expect him to get an interview so fast, we didn't expect one of the first interviews he did they would offer him a job, we didn't expect they would make him such an awesome offer we couldn't refuse.  God handed us what we were asking for on a silver platter.  It was so obvious it was a God thing, it didn't take long for us to say yes.  It didn't take us long to realize that we needed to step out in faith and trust God to take care of all the other details that needed to follow.  I will admit though, at first I was expecting everything else to go as quickly.  I was expecting God to work miracles ASAP and BOOM: our house would be sold, we would buy another one and everything would happen just as fast as getting the job did.

Well it's been almost 7 weeks now and God isn't going BOOM here it is on a silver platter.  God is using this time to teach Travis and I so much.  About who He is, about ourselves, and about our relationship with each other.  I'm learning to fully rely on God so much more than I ever have.  I'm learning that even when it doesn't feel like it, He's with me holding my hand.  I'm learning that having faith in Him is knowing without a doubt that He will do what He said He would do for us.....no matter how long it takes.  I'm learning that I am so much stronger than I ever thought.  Do I like this situation? Absolutely not.  I have really bad days where I miss my hubby so much it hurts but I know at the end of this it will be so worth it because we were being obedient to God.  I'm learning to cherish every little moment I have with my family and not get distracted when I"m with them.  There is so much in this world that doesn't need as much attention as I give it.  Social Media, television, busy-work.  I'm learning how to date my hubby again.  When he comes back on Saturdays it truly does feel like we are dating all over again, and we are needing to learn how to communicate better so we don't feel so far apart all the time.  God is using this time to make us better people, better spouses, better parents.......

Trav and I aren't so naive to think that there aren't people out there who have better ideas of how we should be handling this situation.  What we should do with the house, with the job.  In today's world everyone has an opinion.  Everyone in today's world thinks that their way is the best way.  But I'm here to tell you God's way is the best way.  We are doing everything in our power to make sure we are doing what God is asking of us.  You have no idea how bad sometimes I want to say forget trying to sell the house.  Get a renter in here and let's move.  But then I calm my emotions and starting listening to what God wants.  And then that feeling leaves me and I realize right now, in this moment God is asking us to wait.  To wait on Him to move in the situation.  He has a plan and I don' know what that is yet but I do know we are doing what He asks of us right now.  In the past week I have seen so many blessings pouring out helping me to know and have peace over this situation.

If you are in a situation right now where you don't know which way to go.  Don't listen to what you want, don't listen to those around you.  Listen to God.  Spend time with Him and listen for His calming voice to say "This way child." It wont' be the easy path, it won't be the popular path, but I promise it will be the right path in the end....

I don't love this situation God, but I LOVE you.....

"Your own ears will hear him

Right behind you a voice will say,

'This is the way you should go.'

whether to the right or to the left." 

-Isaiah 30:21

Month One: 3 lessons learned

This week marks the 1 month marker since Trav left to start his job at Farmers Cooperative in Canby MN.  It marks the day we started a long distance marriage.  It marks the day we officially said, "God we are trusting you with this.  We are trusting that the path you have laid out before us is right one." In all honestly it has been the longest month of my life.....

Marriage isn't supposed to be this way.  Family life isn't supposed to be this way.  It's not 'normal' to only see your husband and father to your baby one day a week.  It's not 'normal' for a married person to sleep alone in her big queen sized bed.  I've always been used to long crazy hours 2 out of the 4 seasons of the year.  I knew what I was signing up for there.  But at least then I got to see a shadow sleeping next to me.  At least I got to stay up until he got home and make him some supper.  Now when he gets off he gets to go back to an empty small hotel room where a microwavable meal awaits him.  It's not 'normal'. Not 'normal' at all.  But in this past month, I have learned some things.....and in the next coming days and weeks until we are together again I'm sure I'll learn a great deal more.  And I'm sure that's what God has in mind.......

1.  It sucks. Didn't take many days to figure that one out.  When you say "I Do" it usually means you get to live with the love of your life.  It usually means when you have babies, you will share the responsibilities of parenting and that they will be there to give you a break every now and then.  Let's just say I have a great deal more of respect for single moms, military spouses, and any woman that has a husband who travels for work all the time.  It's not how it's supposed to be.  It's just not.

2. Trusting God has a plan is not as easy as it sounds. Sure we can all say we trust God's plan but when it comes down to it and God isn't working in our timing, it's just not that easy.  What's easy is saying I'm done.  I don't want to do this anymore I just want my husband back.  I just want to live together under one roof again.  And believe me I've had days where I've wanted to say that....was so ready to throw in the towel.  But God didn't bring us here just to give up.  He doesn't say His paths are the easy ones.  The devil takes any and every opportunity he can to make sure we fail and turn off on our own course.  And when that happens, we have to fall on our knees and pray.  Tell God how we are hurting and ask for strength.  With Him we are so much stronger than we think.

3. When we do fully trust God, He will give you peace and blessings more than you can imagine.  I'm a planner.  I should be freaking out most of the time.  And of course I have moments where I'm really sad and missing our 'normal' life. Times when I want to pull my hair out because Maci is driving me crazy.  But above all that I'm at peace with where we are at.  Our buyers for our house are out there.  I have no doubts.  God's timing is always perfect and once this is all over with we will look back as a family and go, "AHHH that's why you waited God."  And since we laid this all at His feet, He has been blessing us.  Right after Trav left, my calendar started filling up with Pampered Chef parties.  Last time I counted I had 8 parties in a matter of 4 weeks.  Craziness and I was trying to figure out why now.  Why now when I'm hoping to move any time.  And right now I can tell you 2 reasons why. Number 1: God knew I would need breaks from being a mommy.  He knows how much I love Maci but all mom's need a break.  This gives me a little push to make sure I get that break.  Number 2: Trav is living in a hotel.  Not a super fancy hotel but hotels for a months at a time are not cheap.  And we didn't know how we would be affording it.  I get paid this week and Trav's next months payment is due this week as well.  My paycheck is more than enough to pay for it.  A huge blessing.

I know there will be many more things I will learn between now and whenever our time in the "waiting place" is through.  I just want to encourage anyone else that's in the "waiting place" for whatever reason to keep waiting.  Keep praying.  Keeping believing.  Keep trusting.  We aren't out of it yet, and I know it will get harder before it gets easier.  But I know that without Christ by my side during all this, I would have fallen completely apart by now.......

God never promised it would be easy...

We are over halfway done with our 2nd week of Trav living in Canby while Maci and I are living in an overly clean house without him.  It has probably been the longest 2 weeks of my life.  And frankly I have tried to keep us overly busy so we don't have time to really process what is happening.  If I stop and think about it, I mean truly stop and process everything our family has to do in order to be together again, I honestly might have a break down.  And that's not an option for me.....

During this entire life change, from the very beginning, Travis and I have given it all to God.  We have continually laid it down at His feet since the very first phone call was made.  And because we have done that, I think...no I KNOW that is where my strength is coming from.  I'm usually a big worry wart.  This whole ordeal should make me go INSANE from worry.  But every single time one of those nasty what if thoughts tries to enter my mind, I have said, "God take it.  You know what's going to happen.  I trust You..."  And the worry melts away.

Now that doesn't mean the road thus far as been easy.  We all know when God is trying to do good things in our lives Satan looks for any hole he can to work his way into our minds.  He does everything he can to get in there and destroy all God has planned for us. And as much as we have confidence that this life change is part of the plan God has for us, Satan has already tried to stick his nose where it doesn't belong.  And this morning was no different.  Another hiccup arose that could have easily made us say nope that's it we are done.  And to be honest, I was near a break down.  I went into the bathroom, sat down, and let my feelings out.  And then, God reached down and picked me back up again.

It was almost like someone smacked me across the face to be honest.  God never promised me following Him would be easy.  He never promised to hand me everything I ever wanted for me or my family on a silver platter.  In fact in the bible it says many times there will be times of trouble; but that Christ will be by our side and if we trust in Him, He will RENEW our strength.  (Isaiah 40:31)

I know there are people out there going through stuff.  Stressful stuff.  Hard stuff.  Exhausting stuff.  Horrific stuff.  I know there are people out there dealing with things that I can't even imagine, because honestly there is always someone out there going through something worse than your situation somewhere.  And I hope whatever your situation is, you always remember this.  Always remember that God never never promised it would be easy.  He never ever said there wouldn't be some bumps in the road.  But He has promised over and over again that He will be there with you.  He will renew your strength.  He will see you through it even if sometimes it feels like it will never end.  There is a light at the end of the tunnel with God by your side....

“But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord,
    whose confidence is in him.
 They will be like a tree planted by the water
    that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
    its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
    and never fails to bear fruit.”  -Jeremiah 17:7-8

"I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed to us" -Romans 8:18

Life is too short sometimes...

Death.  It's a hard thing no matter how old a person is.  But there's something to be said about a young person dying.  There is more depth to the grief people that knew the person feels.  The sadness feels a little more heavy.  There's a million more questions of why.  And frankly there can easily be a little more anger. We are supposed to be able to grow up.  Graduate High School.  Graduate College.  Get married.  Raise a family.  Enjoy life until we are old and gray.  And when that doesn't happen...when life throws you a curve ball and someone is gone too soon it just cuts a little deeper.

Yesterday morning the world had another 'too soon too young' person leave this life.  I didn't personal know him but am connected to people that did.  My heart breaks and hurts for all those that loved him.  No words people can say will comfort you in the way you need to be comforted.  Only Jesus can do that....

As Trav and I were getting ready for bed, I looked at him and said, "If you were on the fire department, you would have seen him.  You would have seen a young life gone.  Would you be able to handle that?"  (For those that don't know, Trav has wanted to be on the fire department for a LONG time).  Trav looked away and as he was walking out of the bathroom said, "I've already done that..."

Stupid Chrissy.  Stupid stupid move.  I asked those words without even thinking....Dumb question.

In August 2007 Travis experienced one of his darkest days. We were only 18.  Long story short, Trav drove out to his buddies place in Milan MN to check up on him.  We hadn't been able to get a hold of him for hours and he was supposed to meet up with Trav around lunch time to move into their new apartment.  At around 8:30 that night, Trav found him face first on the living room floor.....he was dead. It's an image that is forever burned into my husbands brain.   We were only 18.  Life isn't supposed to be this way.  We are supposed to be care free and young and having fun.  We experienced all those questions.  Everyone that knew and loved Marshall felt the same extra heaviness that came with his death.  

At 18 years old, Travis, me and everyone else that grieved Marshall learned that life is too short.  We all say that when we hear of someone young dying but when you have lived through that kind of grief.... you say it and actually MEAN it.  That day in August, changed our lives forever.  Trav and I were broken up at the time but you best believe the very next day I got in my car and got to him as fast as I could.  We have been together ever since.  It's sounds cliche but we didn't want to waste one more day of not loving each other.  That day in August, Travis started seeking to know Jesus in a more serious way. God doesn't want tragedies to happen but you best believe He creates all things to work for the good. (Romans 8:28)  Stronger relationships were a big thing that came out of Marshall's passing.  

Bottom line, life is too short friends.  Those of us on this earth that have witnessed first hand a young person's death will tell you that.  And I guarantee you that we aren't just saying it to say it.  Start living today.  And no I don't mean go do crazy things.  I don't mean go jump of cliffs or drink all you can drink.  I mean start living today how you want to live the rest of your life.  Start living your life by being the best possible you.  Don't keep waiting to resolve those tough conflicts.  Don't keep waiting to fix things in your life that need to be fixed.  Don't put off one more day without getting to know Jesus.  He loves you so much and wants to be there for you through all of life's ups and downs.  

To those of you who knew and loved Kris Tanner, I pray you find comfort in Jesus.  There are no words that anyone can say to make you feel better.  Only our sweet sweet Savior can help.  And He's holding you in His arms and crying with you.  

I searched for Kris on FB to see if I recognized him from church.  Of course he has most of his profile hidden, which hopefully most of us do but what I did see there melted my heart a little.  The few status updates I could see, were of him thanking our glorious God for the day.  So go out into the world and be that kind of person.  Thank God every day for the gift of today.  Do something great today, even if it's just a small act of kindness.......and pray for the Tanner family and everyone else that knew this young man.....

Life is too shorts sometimes.  It's just too short....

   

Courage or Comfort: That is the question

God has a way of constantly surprising you.  Every time you think He can't bless you more, He seems to pull out all the stops and leaves your mouth hanging open saying "Wow".  For the past several months, Travis and I have felt very 'unsettled' here.  We have felt like a change was coming we just weren't sure what that change would entail.  It honestly is probably one of the weirdest feelings ever.  A feeling where you know God is at work, but for whatever reason He is keeping it hidden.  All we could do was pray over it.  Pray that whatever was coming, He would prepare our hearts and minds so that when the time came, we would know what He wanted of us.  That we would know the direction we were meant to take our family in.  And after every prayer was the waiting game.

Waiting is hard.  Especially when you can feel something exciting coming but you just don't know what it is.  It's like a kid waiting for Christmas morning.  As a child you know without a doubt your parents put awesome amazing presents for you under that tree but of course you have to wait until Christmas morning to open them.  So instead you sit and dream of every magical thing that could be in those pretty boxes.  My favorite verse about waiting has become:

"I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning" Psalm 130:5-6

I knew if we didn't wait IN the Lord, and if we didn't put our HOPE in His word, that the devil could easily put stuff in our path that wasn't God's plan for our lives.  I didn't want to make the wrong decision.  I wanted us to make the best possible decision for our family. 

At first an opportunity came up that we thought might be what we were waiting for.  It involved me going back to work but we wanted to at least give it a shot in case it was our answer to our prayers.  So I applied and then we just continued to pray.  We thought of it as if it was meant to happen God would work it out.  As the weeks pasted though, Trav started talking to a recruiter.  Ryan's job was to find jobs for those in the agronomy field.  Trav knew he wanted to shift his line of work and move up but currently and sadly his current job didn't have that opportunity. Of course, none of the jobs he was interested in were around the Litchfield area.  So again we just continued to pray over it.  Deep in our hearts though, we never thought anything would happen this year.  We thought Trav would have some interviews but in the end, none of them would work out.  

Fast forward a few months and I got offered the job I had applied for.  I was beyond excited.  Yes I would miss my baby girl but I would only be working part time and we so needed the extra income.  Trav had had an interview but we didn't think anything would come of it.  We thought if he did get offered the job, it wouldn't be enough to be worth it to move.  We started getting daycare lined up and thinking ahead to how big of a change this would all be.  But we also thought about what a blessing it was all going to be as well.  

A few days later after accepting my new job we were in the car on our way up to Duluth to take Trav's sister to college.  Trav got a call from his recruiter letting us know that he would be receiving a job offer for us by the following Tuesday.  Ryan told us what the ballpark figure was and what little he knew about the job itself.  We were in total and complete shock.  How could this be happening?? Why on earth would God give us both opportunities when they are so far apart from each other?? And why do we now need to wait 5 whole days before we actually get the offer?? I. Want. To. Know. NOW! But funny, God doesn't always work the way we want it and in the timing we want.  

The next week was a long waiting game.  Each day would end with us not hearing too much and still left in limbo.  Wondering how much our life would change.  Wondering if we would be packing our family up and moving.  Wondering if this really was something God wanted.  I felt like all we both did was pray.  Pray that if it was meant to be Trav would be offered what is fair.  Prayed that God would give us the wisdom we needed to make such a life altering decision.  Prayed that all the stress that was building up would not start ripping us apart.  Looking back I'm sure that was all part of God's plan.  He was and still is teaching us how to fully rely on Him for everything instead of just going by what we want for us.  

Friday 9.7.13: I was in the bathroom getting ready to go out and celebrate my bday with my hubby.  He walked in and said: "Well I got a call today".  Here it is.  The moment I have prayed over for what seemed like months now.  As he described the details they were offering   The job title he would be given and everything that goes along with getting a new job, I couldn't help but have a smile come to my face.  I was watching my husband's eyes dance with delight.  This manager had faith in him.  This manager wanted to give my husband the opportunity to push forward with his dreams.  We quickly figured out that this is what God had been planning for us.  I have never felt so much peace in such a chaotic situation.  Saying yes to this opportunity meant so many more uncertainties followed.  And yet, there we were, grinning ear to ear all weekend as we talked about it all. 

And among all the excitement we had more than that offer to think about.  I was supposed to be starting my new job in a week.  There were so many unknowns still but how could I just act like we were staying forever and continue on with that when I knew in my heart this was it for us and Litchfield in a few months or so.  I couldn't bottom line.  So I had to tell them everything that was going on.  I could either keep everything as planned and work until the house sells, or they could decide to find someone else.  It was their choice.  And I had faith in whatever their decision was because bottom line, I knew when I looked back when all was said and done I would see the work of God.  

We need prayer from all of you.  These next several months are going to be hard.  We have to get our house on the market and sold quickly.  And to get ready for that we need to get everything organized and lots of small stuff fixed up.  Trav will be leaving for Canby MN at the beginning of the month and unless things go super quickly, he will sadly be leaving without us.  Maci and I will be staying in Litchfield until the house sells.  Trav will come home on weekends when he can and unfortunately that wont be much the first several weeks.  He will be starting right around when things go crazy and will be working 6 days a week.  And they will be his long hours just like they were here.  So we need prayer that the house sells quickly (and for a good price at that), that we will find housing for ourselves quickly after that, and that Maci and I will get through these next several months without our main man around.  

With everything that goes with this new chapter in our lives, with all the stress and challenges that we will be facing, it would be so easy for us to decide to not go through with it.  We could just say no, stay in Litchfield and I would just keep the job I was offered.  We could choose comfort.  But sometimes God chooses us to be courageous.  To do something out of our comfort zone so He can bless us.  So He can use us in a greater plan He has for us.  I read a quote in a blog last week that stood out to me.  Gave me more confidence in our decision.

"You can choose courage or you can choose comfort, but you cannot choose both.  They are mutually exclusive" -Brene Brown

Right now, in this moment.  In this challenge God has placed before us, I choose courage.

My husband doesn't like change.  He will be the first to admit it.  So God giving him such an enormous amount of peace is such an incredible blessing.  We can't thank the Co-op here in town enough for everything they have done in the past 5 years.  They are the reason our first home was in this beautiful little town.  There will be so many tears the day we have to officially say good-bye to this place.  We have made lasting friendships here.  We have had so many firsts for our family here.  We created our family here.  We found a church home that was beyond our dreams here.  God blessed us many many times here.  I don't want to think about all we are leaving behind too much because I know we will be back to visit often.  Trav's family is all from the Kimball area, so yes dear friends we will be back often.  

God has been in this journey from the very start.  We have seen all his blessings throughout the whole situation so far.  We know this is a gift from God.  If I didn't tell you this personally, please don't take it personally.  This has been a very big secret in our household.  We didn't want to tell anyone until we knew it was happening and we knew it was God's will.  

Thank you all in advance for your love, your support, and your prayers.  We couldn't do this without all of you.  

With all our love,

The Petty's

Travis, Chrissy & Maci

***Please out of respect for us don't ask where I was offered a job.  Our family, has chosen to keep that private for various reasons.  But I do feel it is an important part in this journey we are on.  God has a reason for keeping me as a stay at home mama, of that I am sure :)

Light in a Dark World

It's 9-11.  A day that no one in America can or will forget.  A day that no matter how old or young you were that day, you remember exactly where you were, what you were doing, who you were with, and what you felt.  Look around at our country and you will see it still affecting us.  It feels like the tragedies have become more apparent since that day.  And therefore it is so easy to look down at my baby girl and think,

"Why did I bring you into this hurting world?"

And then I look at the way her face lights up when she smiles and think "Yep.  That's why".  You see the world is gonna continue to be a hurting world.  There's no way around it.  Terrorist attacks are still gonna happen all over the world.  Hate crimes will still be going on.  Shootings aren't going to stop.  Adults and kids all over the world are still gonna get hurt, be killed, or have other awful things happen to them.  It's not going to stop, because Satan is still around folks.  He isn't going anywhere until God says so, and for whatever reason God hasn't said so yet.

But you see, we need to keep having babies and keep raising them up right so they can be a change in the world.  If my baby girl grows up to change one person's heart, helps one soul get to know Jesus, is an amazing friend to one person, it's all worth the risk of having her in this fallen world.  Because you know what? She's going to be a light in it.  God has big plans for her and I'm so excited to see what those plans involve.  I can't wait to see her impacting her classmates in a positive way when she starts school.  Will I worry about her? Of course every day.  But I will also be praying for her every day.  Praying that she is kept safe.  Praying that she is strong enough to resist temptation.  Praying for all the other people she will encounter.

I can't wait to see what she does when she is in high school, in college, and beyond.  As long as I let God use me to help her know Him fully, she is going to do amazing things.  It won't be easy and there will be times when I don't want to send her off but as long as I put my faith and trust in Jesus, He will help me through it.  He will give me the strength to help her spread her wings and fly......

But for now,in this very moment.....I'm gonna enjoy every second I have with her at home, safe in my arms.  I'm gonna enjoy every sweet innocent look in her eyes.  Because right now, she has no idea what this world is like and for that I so envy her......

You can't see inside a heart....

The past few weeks I've been feeling pretty blessed.  I have a husband who loves me unconditionally. A daughter who thinks I can do anything.  A house, food, a car.  A God who is there for me even when I don't feel like it.  A support system of some pretty awesome family and friends.  What more could a girl want?? Sure we could use more money to pay the bills, but who couldn't these days?  Overall we are a pretty blessed family.  I try my best to thank God every day for all He has given me, even on the hard days.  But then tonight, I watched a video about what we would see if we looked into people's hearts and it touched me.  It touched me so much because right now, I know so many hearts who are weeping.  I know so many hearts who are aching.  And I guarantee you all walk by hearts like those every day, and you don't even know it. 

See in America, in the culture we are all growing old in, we are taught to hold it all in.  Act like we have it all together and need no one's help.  What do you do when you greet someone? You say, "Hey how's it going?" or "Hi, how are you?" And what is always our response?? "Good.  You?" or "It's fine" or "eh it's going".  No matter how we are feeling in our heart, we rarely say the truth.  Why? Because we are raised in a culture where they teach us that that person asking really doesn't care.  How many times have you asked someone how it's going, when you know darn well they are struggling, and secretly you are praying they just say fine and move on because you don't have the 'time' to listen. Or you won't know what to say? I promise almost everyone reading this has done that very thing at one point or another.  Because in America we get too darn busy worrying about ourselves to reach out sometimes.  It's true.  We all do it.  Right or wrong we are human and it's in our nature. 

But the thing is folks, the real question we need to ask ourselves is honestly, "What would Jesus do?" And it sounds so clique and so overused but it's so the truth.  We were made in God's image.  And if we were made in His image, we need to strive to be like Him. To try our very best on this earth to do what He would do.  Say what He would say.  Listen like He would listen.  It's not easy and we are gonna fail sometimes.  We really are gonna be too busy sometimes, and if that's the case, make it a point to reach out as soon as you can.  Because folks, I know way too many people hurting right now.  I know way too many people with broken hearts.  I know way too many people suffering.  And chances are....you do too.

Right now I can tell you with 100% certainty that somewhere on this earth, there is a dad who is working hard to overcome his addictions so he can be complete and whole and be with his family again. There is a man who has just been told he has months to live.  There is a mom who is watching her child go through so much hurt and pain that she just so badly wants to take it away for him.  There is a mom who is trying to keep it together for her kids when she just wants to fall apart.  There is a man who never thought he would get a divorce, having to do just that.  There is a husband and wife out there who are watching all their friends and family get pregnant, and they have been trying for months if not years and it's still not happening for them.  And the list goes on....

I'm sure you could fit people you know in your own life into some of the above.  Because these hurts are not uncommon.  In fact they have become very common because we live in such a broken world.  But just because they are common doesn't mean every story is the same.  Dig deeper into the hurt and every story will be different.

If we are all made in God's image, they why don't we start acting like it.  Why don't we as Christians stand up and say enough is enough. I'm not just gonna say I care, I'm gonna start showing it to anyone and everyone around me.  We need to start opening our eyes and see the needs of those around us.  See their hurt and in Jesus' love do what we can to show them His love. 

I challenge you in the next week to start really listening to people.  Take the time to hear their heart.  To see inside their heart and everything they are going through.  Everyone wants to know someone cares about their story.  God does, but He needs us to help show them.  Sometimes all it takes is a simple hug, a cup of coffee, a listening ear, or someone to just say, "It's gonna be ok.  We will get through this."

And remember, you don't always know what someones going through.  So when you walk by that stranger...always say hi and smile.  It just might brighten their day....even if for just a moment.

"He comforts us in our troubles so that we can comfort others.

When they are troubled,

we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us."

-2 Corinthians 1:4

If you are hurting, may this song give you peace in knowing there is a God who is so badly wanting to help you.  This song brings tears to my eyes every time.  Enjoy. Praise Him.  Worship Him.

Hardest Job of all..

Let's face it.  Motherhood is hard.  Period.  End of Story.  Any mother will admit that to you if you truly ask.  And if they say it's easy, chances are they are lying to you.  Every time you think  you've got it all figure out and under control, the little dears switch it up on you and throw you for a loop.  You find ways to worry about them even when they are completely 100% fine.  Once you get through 1 stage, you are headed right into a new one.  It might be one that gives you a break, or it might be one that makes you want to scream and count down the minutes and hours until bedtime or nap time.  (Which by the way, those 2 times are sacred in our home.....completely and totally sacred :) )

We have been so unbelievably blessed with Maci. She has been such a good baby overall since birth.  Always has a smile for anyone willing to accept one (and even those that turn away grumpy, which rarely happens), listens to instructions (most of the time), and overall just has such a happy attitude.  We know how blessed we are and we get asked quite often if she is always smiling.  With that being said.....she isn't.  She isn't always smiling and we go through those awful stages just like everyone else. Maci just so happens to be like me when I was little.  To everyone else I looked so sweet and innocent, but trust me with my parents I could totally be a different story. Right mom? :) To the rest of the world Maci looks to be like a breeze, and most of the time she is.  But when the doors close in our home sometimes, we do get the screaming and tantrums.  The attitudes where nothing makes her happy and the buckets of tears.

This past week we are knee deep in a stage.  It could be she has just hit a point where she is realizing she can't always get what she wants or it could be that we are working on our last few teeth.  Yep girl only has 3 more left before her 2 year molars in the winter.  And can I just say she started out with only 2 teeth in January.  Yea just think about that.....10 or so teeth in a matter of a few months.  Mommas out there just feel my pain for a moment ;). 

The past few days have been difficult to say the least.  There has been screaming and whining and crying....from both of us.  There are times when I cry with her from being so exhausted with the day of fighting her on everything she knows she shouldn't be doing.  There are times when I want to just sit in the bathroom and lock the door.  And then there are times when daddy gets home and neither one of us can get to the door fast enough.  We have tried different outings and activities and she isn't satisfied with any of it.  She just going through a phase and I keep reminding myself of that.  But it's just so. hard.

But then out of no where God uses this little angel faced baby to speak to me and teach me something to simple that I sit there amazed.  Yesterday I was trying to get something done that I felt the Lord telling me to do.  As we were rushing around the house trying to leave after a rough start to the morning I couldn't find Maci's other shoe.  When you are already frustrated something so little can just send you over the edge.  I kept repeating "Maci find your shoe....Maci find your shoe." The poor girl just kept staring at me and to be honest it was making me more irritated.  Finally I said in a pretty gruff voice from being so mad that I couldn't find the stupid thing, "Maci! Find your shoe!" She looked at me puzzled and calming bent over to pick up the other shoe I was looking for....that was RIGHT in FRONT of her!  I sat down and started to laugh and she proceeded to laugh with me.  I felt so stupid.  What I was looking for all along was right there.  I gave my sweet babe a hug and kiss and off we went.

I didn't give much thought to that moment again until this morning on our walk.  It popped up into my mind again and then I heard His voice.  And once again I laughed at how simple the answer was.

"Daughter, I have all the answers to your life.  All the solutions to your problems.  If only you would remember that always.  There would be no reason for frustration and anger, if only you would trust me always."

I then just pictured Maci's face in that moment when she was like "Mom DUH!! The shoe is right here!"  And then I pictured God's face when He sees us searching so hard and He knows the answer.  All He wants from us is to ask.  All He wants from us is to trust in Him.  All He wants from us is to love Him.  It's such a hard one to do in such a rush, impatient, do it on our own world.  But if we did more leaning and trusting and asking on Him, our lives would be so much simpler! 

"Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning, for I am trusting You.  Show me where to walk, for I give myself to You."   -Psalm 143:8

I'm gonna leave you with this video.  Music touches the deepest part of me and this is one of my many favorite songs by Chris Tomlin.  Right now it makes me think of a very special family to our family that is going through some super tough stuff.  Always remember that when you think you have it bad, there is someone else out there who is going through something worse than you are.  If that's you, may this song give you comfort.

Have a Little Faith...

We can all sit here and say we have faith and trust in the plans that God has laid out before us but how much do we 100% believe that and not worry one bit about what the consequences will be or if it's going to happen when we want it (which usually is right now)? Honestly it's so easy to say that we trust the Lord with our right now and our future.  It's so easy to say we have faith in Him that He will come through with all He has promised us.  But frankly there are probably very few times where we haven't even given it a second thought.  Where we had so much faith and trust in Him that we just did or said what He wanted us to without a second thought.  We are all human and it's in our nature to question and think it over.  Especially if it's something outside of our comfort zone or something we really don't want to do, or even something that scares us.

Right now our family is waiting on so many questions that have no answers.  We know God will get us where we want to be in His timing but it's so hard to wait when you so badly desire something.  While I was in the shower this morning, dreaming the dreams we have been praying and begging for; God put a memory in my mind where I had 100% faith and trust in Him where I didn't even question it.  I think of this memory often because it is so dear to me but I never thought of it in such a way that would give me so much hope in all areas of my life.

Those of you who are close with us know I had one very long tiring labor with Maci.  I woke up the day before she was born with contractions at 4:00 am and then eventually they went away until 1:00pm that day.  We went to the hospital that night and in the end I was in labor for 25 hours with over 4 hours of pushing.  At about 1:30 pm the day Maci arrived, the doctor came in and told me that he needed to start prepping me for a  c-section since my water had broke about 12 hours prior and things weren't progressing the way he had hoped.  Now if you know me at all, you know that it's very hard for me to stand up for myself.  Especially to a stranger.  I always worry about how people are viewing me.  But at that moment when he was telling me what I so badly didn't want to happen, it was like someone else entered my body.  Travis to this day still tells me how much he was shocked by how I acted at that point.  (As a side note, I"m a baby when it comes to pain ect so 'normal' Chrissy would have just wanted it all to be over) Instead of saying ok to something I didn't want to happen and becoming a basket case, I looked in that doctor's eyes and said, "No I CAN do this."  He proceeded to tell me about possible complications that could arise if we didn't, ect.  I looked at my nurses and at my sweet husband, then looked back in the doctor's face and asked how long he would give me.  "I'll give you 20 minutes, and then we need to do a c-section."  My response?

"I can do this.  God's on my side."

Within 2 contractions our sweet baby girl who was being so stubborn on coming out was out in my arms and crying away.  Still brings tears to my eyes as I think back on that moment.  I know the Lord was whispering in my ear, "Daughter trust me.  I've got your back.  I will make sure you are both safe.  You CAN do this.  Trust.  Have faith." 

I did not think twice about what needed to be done in that moment.  I trusted the Lord would take care of us and I had faith that He would fulfill what He told me would happen.  God knew how much I didn't want a c-section.  He knew about how much the idea of it scared me.

What does this all have to do with my every day life? I need to start having that kind of faith and trust in Him EVERYDAY.  I need to stop questioning why not now.  I need to stop trying to make it happen in my timing.  I need to stop fighting it when it's something I don't want to do.  When I need to say or do something in His name, I need stop being so scared about what the reactions of others will be.  I need to start living with total and complete faith in Him.  No questions asked. 

"Then Jesus told them, 'I tell you the truth, if you have faith and don't doubt, you can do things like this and much more.  You can even say to this mountain, 'May you be lifted up and thrown into the sea' and it will happen.  you can pray for anything, and if you have faith, you will receive it."                                                                                                                Matthew 21:21-22

Help Me Find it.....

"In His grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well.  So if God has given you the ability to prophesy, speak out with as much faith as God has give you.  If your gift is serving others, serve them well.  If you are a teacher, teach well.  If your gift is to encourage others, be encouraging.  If it is giving, give generously.  And if you have the gift of showing kindness to others, do it gladly."               -Romans 12:6-8

Last fall I started a study on spiritual gifts.  I'm not gonna lie and say I was surprised by what it showed me my top spiritual gift was.  I've always known compassion was what mine was.  I'm not saying that to sound full of myself.  I actually didn't know that was mine because I thought I showed compassion to everyone, ect.  It has always stood out to me because of the 'bad' that tends to come with having it be up there in your list.  I can tell you word for word almost about all the times someone has hurt me.  And not because I'm holding a grudge, and not because whoever wronged me was so bad.  It's because hurtful words and actions have always cut me way too deep.  Deeper than most I would say.  My heart hurts just a little bit longer, it feels for those that most wouldn't even give a thought to, and it weeps for everything Jesus would weep for a little bit harder. 

The past few months I have honestly been wondering, "Why me Lord? Why do I have to carry this burden?"  Because honestly sometimes it is a burden.  To lay it all out there, I have often wondered why I find myself praying for those who have done some awful things to Gods people.  My heart aches badly for those who do things that are not in God's will.  And sometimes, I don't want to feel sorry for them, but it's written in my heart. It's written in my heart that God still loves them, and weeps at what the world has come to.  So I've been asking a lot, "why me?" 

Very recently a dear friend sent a text message to me telling me to read Romans 12-14.  And that's where I got the above verse from.  And that's when it all came rushing in like a flood:

God gave ME this gift.  He gave it to ME for a reason.  A reason I won't know until I accept that I'm supposed to have it.  I'm supposed to feel a little harder and stronger.  I'm supposed to weep a little bit harder and longer.  Those people who I don't want to feel for and do, I'm supposed to feel that way towards them because it leads me to my knees in prayer for their souls.  Because if I don't, who will? I'm part of the body of Christ.  And in the body of Christ, every part is vital. 

So this is a challenge friends.  Whatever God may have called you to do or be, do it for Him.  Give it to Him, all of it.  Even if you can't understand why He made you that way, I promise you He did it for a reason and you just don't know it yet.  And honestly you might not know why until you get to Heaven.  But I plan to open up my gift and let it soar.  Whatever He wants to do with it I'm gonna let Him.  I'm gonna stop fighting it and just let it be. 

A few months ago while coming back from Willmar a song came on the radio and I remember falling in love with it.  I wanted to remember it so badly but of course I forgot and hadn't heard it since.  The message was exactly what I wanted for my life right now.  My cry out to the Lord.  Well guys, seriously when I started writing this that song came on the radio.  God is so good!! Brings tears to my eyes every time I listen.... enjoy :)

A must read for us Christains living in today's world

My heart has been so very heavy the last few weeks.  Things I've seen on the internet and Facebook have been weighing heavily on my mind.  Making me start to wonder how on earth I am going to be able to raise Godly children in such an ungodly world.  I am so not one to talk politics on social media sites because frankly, even friends and family can be so cruel when someone has a different belief than they do.  Most of the time it's completely fine for them to plaster their opinion all over Facebook and yet I know if I put up a belief of mine I would be condemn and ridiculed.  I would be beaten down to the ground with their words and hateful speech of a God I so dearly love.  There would be words twisted, books twisted and everything in between.  If you know me, you know where I stand on hot topics of the world.  If you know me, you know I'm not a judge, I'm not a fighter. 

As I got on Facebook this afternoon, yet again my heart got heavy.  Facebook can be such a fun thing and lately it's become such a not fun thing.  I've seen fights and hurtful words being spread around on all sides of arguments in today's world.  I've also noticed most of the time, it's a very one sided fight.  I guarantee you if you go on your Facebook you will clearly see which side of a certain fight is the only side being shared around.  I started to pray and dig into what God wants from us who love Him so dearly.  It breaks His heart to see so much hate and anger and sin going around.  And that's how I came to the book of Jude.  I will be honest I have never read it before today.  It has brought tears to my eyes this afternoon.  It is a short book in the bible, and frankly I cannot just choose one verse of it to share because it is all way to good, and something us Christians living in todays world need to be reminded of.  Therefore I am going to re-type it here so you don't even have to lift a finger to search for it.  If you have a bible I encourage you to go grab it and look it up.  I have highlighted most of the end of the book.  The end is things us Christians need to be doing to stand up for our faith and our God. 

"I am writing to all who have been called by God the Father, who loves you and keeps you safe in the care of Jesus Christ. May God give you more and more mercy, peace, and love.

Dear friends, I have been eagerly planning to write to you about the salvation we share.  But now I find that I must write about something else, urging you to DEFEND the faith that God has entrusted once for all time to His holy people.  I say this because some ungodly people have wormed their way into your churches, saying God's marvelous grace allows us to live immoral lives.  The condemnation of such people was recorded long ago, for they have denied our only Master and Lord, Jesus Christ.  

So I want to remind you, though you already know these things, that Jesus first rescued the nation of Israel from Eygpt, but later He destroyed those who did not remain faithful.  And I remind you of the angels who did not stay within the limits of authority God gave them but left the place where they belonged.  God has kept them securely chained in the prisions of darkness, waiting for the great day of judgement.  And don't forget Sodom and Gomorrah and their neighboring towns, which were filled with immorality and every kind of sexual perversion.  Those cities were destroyed by fire and serve as a warning of eternal fire and God's judgement.

In the same way, these people - who claim authority from their dreams - live immoral lives, defy authority, and scoff at the supernatural beings.  But even Michael, one of the mightiest angels, did not dare accuse the devil of blasphemy, but simply said, "The Lord rebuke you!" (This took place when Michael was arguing with the devil about Moses' body).  But these people scoff at things they do not understand.  Like unthinking animals, they do whatever their instincts tell them, and so they bring about their own destruction.  What sorrow awaits them! For they follow in the footsteps of Cain who killed his brother.  Like Balaam, they deceive people for money.  And like Korah, they perish in their rebeillion.

When these people eat with you in your fellowship meals commemorating the Lord's love, they are like dangerous reefs that can shipwreck you.  They are like shameless shepherds who care only for themselves.  They are like clouds blowing over the land without giving any rain.  They are like trees in the autumn that are doubly dead, for they bear no fruit and have been pulled up by the roots.  They are like wild waves of the sea, churning up the foam of their shameful deeds.  They are like wandering starts, doomed forever to blackest darkness.

Enoch, who lived in the 7th generation of Adam, prophesied about these people.  He said, "Listen! The Lord is coming with countless thousands of his holy ones to execute judgement on the people of the world.  He will convict every person of all the ungodly things they have done and for all the insults that ungodly sinners have spoken against him.

These people are grumblers and complainers, living only to satisfy their desires.  They brag loudly about themselves, and they flatter others to get what they want. 

But you, dear friends must remember what the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ said.  They told you that in the last times there would be scoffers whose purpose in life is to satisfy their ungodly desires.  These people are the ones who are creating divisions among you.  They follow their natural instincts because they do not have God's spirit in them.

But you, dear friends, must build each other up in your most holy faith, pray in the power of the Holy Spirit, and await the mercy our Lord Jesus Christ, who will bring you eternal life.  In this way, you will keep yourselves safe in God's love.

And you must show mercy to those whose faith is wavering.  Rescue others by snatching them from the flames of judgement. Show mercy to still others, but do so with great caution, hating the sings that contaminate their lives.

Now all glory to God, who is able to keep you from falling away and will bring you with great joy into his glorious presence without a single fault.  All glory to him who alone is God, our Savior through Jesus Christ our Lord.  All glory, majesty, power, and authority are his before all time, and in the present and beyond all time! Amen!"
-Jude NLT

 

Taking a plunge into a little bit of the unknown

With much nerves and excitement I'm writing this post.  It is truly amazing looking back over the past few months and seeing how God has slowly been nudging me to make a change.  Eventually sometimes He does have to start screaming in my ear but this time it just took a series of serious nudges before I said "Ok Ok. If this is what you want for our family I will take the step out of my box and do it."

You see many many months ago I was talking to a dear friend who was doing Mary Kay.  I remember having multiple conversations with her about the company and her trying to convince me I could do it.  Pretty sure I laughed in her face every time she said that but God bless her heart for thinking I could be successful at it.  If you know me at all, you know I barely wear make up period.  A little eye liner and a little mascara and I'm good to go. ;) That was nudge number one. (And no this doesn't end with me becoming a Mary Kay Consultant.)

Then this winter I started feeling like I was supposed to be doing something on top of my photography business.  I wasn't sure if God was trying to tell me to go back to a part/full time job (which I really didn't want to do) or what exactly the desire was.  Trav and I talked about what we thought I should be doing, if I should be looking for part time evening work ect.  I think we did this on and off again for a few months.  Neither of us really wanted me to start working again like that but we were still feeling like there was something I was supposed to be looking into, we just couldn't pin point what. 

Finally last Thursday evening I went to a sweet friend's house for her Lia Sophia party.  Pretty much just went to see her beautiful face and eat her delicious food ;).  On the drive home I started feeling that same nudge again.  There was something I was missing and something I should be doing.  The next day I started looking at all the different companies like Lia Sophia.  You know the ones where you are your own boss and have parties in peoples homes?  I knew Mary Kay wasn't my thing and I knew Lia Sophia wasn't my thing.  I'm a girlie girlie but not when it comes to jewelry and make-up.  I knew I wouldn't succeed in that venture.  Then Pampered Chef came to my mind.  I began to think of the amazing products I currently have in my kitchen and how much I love them.  I thought about the party I went to last Spring and how much fun it was to sit around with my girlfriends, eat some yummy food, and look at some amazingly tempting products I wanted in my kitchen.  So what was the next step? I prayed and prayed and prayed all day off and on about it.  When Trav got home from work we talked about it and prayed some more.  Saturday I emailed a gal from Pampered Chef wanting more information on how it all works and prayed some more.  During this time I talked to a few girlfriends and of course mom and got their take.  All of them were so encouraging and positive in thinking I could do it. 

Last night Carla called me back.  We talked for over 45 minutes about it and I got all the details.  Honestly so much less scary than I thought it would be and she seems like such an encourager that it gave me the confidence I was seeking.  But of course what did I need? Another night to sleep on it and pray some more.  Big decisions are a difficult thing for me.  I like to know what I'm doing is the right choice for me and my family and of course know it is something God wants for us.

Well ladies and gentlemen, this morning I officially emailed Carla and said let's do this!!  I am so excited for all that it could and will bring to our family!! I am so excited for all the people I am going to get to meet in the next few months.  I still have to 'officially' get everything set up but within the next few days that will all be done.  :)

I'm not going to lie though friends, I am going to need my family and friends support in this.  If not by hosting a cooking or catalog show (which I so hope you will be doing because they literally are so much fun!), but by praying for me on this new adventure.  Not only will it get me out of the house a few times a month (which is something all us mommas need sometimes), not only will it hopefully bring in some extra cash for our family, not only will it help me meet more people to hopefully become some of my photography clients, but I also hope it will help me bring the love of Jesus to everyone I meet.  When I am at someone's home who I don't know, I want them to be able to see Jesus in me.  Because that's the ultimate goal for all of our lives isn't it? :)

Have a wonderful week and I will be talking to a lot of you very soon about a grand opening party :)

The Devil Isn't Allowed Here....

In the past few weeks I have started a few different studies beyond my Jesus Calling morning devotional.  One of which is a study that is truly hitting me in the heart and slowly but seriously letting Jesus work on it and mold me more into what He wants for me to be.  The on-line study is through Proverbs 31 and is on the book by Karen Ehman called "Let. It. Go".  A wonderful book about letting go of control over you life and letting God take the reins.  Simply amazing but that isn't truly what I want to share with you today.

There is someone who tries to enter my life every time I go deeper into my relationship with Jesus.  Someone who is so completely jealous of my relationship with Him.  Someone who wants my attention to be on him and him alone.  This person appears every time I open up my heart to my Savior and say, "Lord change me.  Change my heart.  Make it what you want it to be.  Come into my heart and soul and clear out the junk."  Every single time I say those words, there is someone who loves all the junk he sees in my heart and will do and say anything to get me to hold tight to all the junk I so badly want to throw away.  This person isn't welcome in my home.  He is not welcome in my heart.  He is not welcome in my life.  Yet he is so sly and good at what he does that it is so easy to without knowing it open up a window and letting him come crash on the couch for awhile.  If you haven't guessed it by now, his name is the devil.

You would think that after putting my trust in the Lord for so many years and having this happen every time that I would be on the look out and see it coming.  But friends, I never see it coming.  It catches me off guard almost every single time.  That's how the devil works, when he sees an opportunity he is going to take it.  He is so clever that whatever God is laying on my heart in that weeks study to change, the devil usually attacks that the hardest.  I'm going to be completely transparent with you, this week it was this very verse:

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” ~ Proverbs 15:1

I get teary-eyed just thinking about it guys.  Anger is such an easy thing to give into as human beings.  Hurtful words sometimes can come flying out of your mouth before a second thought is even given.  Hurtful words can cut and cut deep.  And ladies.... the devil knows.  He knows how easily as human beings we can fall into anger and everything that follows it.  He knows that relationships are the easiest thing to go after, and the easiest thing to hurt those relationships is in fact anger.  So let me tell you, he has been working hard to enter this home and make a boom.  Every day there has been something new he has used to try to stir up anger and harsh words in this home.  And if I'm being really honest, there are a few times he succeeded. And as much as that makes my heart hurt, I'm so very thankful I can bring those moments to Jesus, lay them down at His feet and not carry that burden and start fresh again.

Therefore I want to take this time to publicly declare that the devil is NOT welcome in my home.  He is NOT welcome near my family.  He is NOT welcome to try and break up my relationships.  He is NOT welcome to slip through the window unnoticed and crash on my couch.  I am a daughter of the King and that's where my heart belongs.  Every time he tries to bring this family down, all it does is bring us to our knees and cry out for Jesus.  Every time he pushes us to the limits, all it does is make us work harder to become more and more like Jesus.  We aren't perfect and we will mess up but boy do we have a Savior that loves us, holds us in His arms, and let us know it's all going to be ok. 

As always I'm going to try and keep my eyes better pealed for ways the devil is going to try and attack.  I challenge you all to do the same.  Try hard to block him before he even tries to knock on the door.  Every time you draw closer to Jesus, I promise friends he will try to bring you back his way.  Don't let him.  Cling tight to our Lord's hand and His promises.  I promise He will see you through whatever the devil tries to throw at you......

~Chrissy