Teach them to be good

Columbine, Virginia Tech, Aurora Theater, Sandy Hook........all 4 horrific events I've sadly had to see happen at my young age of 25.  Events that were so unbelievable that we are still in shock for each one.  Events that lead us to question everything we've ever known. Question whether we are safe, question whether we should send our children to school, question whether we should go to a movie....and sadly some even question whether we really do have an all powerful, merciful God.  No words can ever fully describe what we as a country are feeling.  We know that change has to happen, we just aren't certain what that change might mean for us.....

Travis and I have had so many conversations since last Friday about Sandy Hook.  When we first heard we were on our way to Sioux Falls to celebrate Christmas with my family, so we had a good couple of hours together to feel everything we were feeling and express it to each other.  We got to be angry together, we got to be scared together, and we got to be sad together.  I'm so thankful God gave me this man to walk through this world with me.  Travis knows my heart so well and shares in the same feelings I have on so many things.

Last night after Maci was safely put into her bed our conversation turned back to that day.  We both shared new things we had heard through the news on it.  Of course talked about the ridiculous things people say on facebook about it.  (Let's all be honest, there are some really really far out there things being posted)   I told him about an interview I had seen on Katie with a mother who lost her daughter in Columbine.  This mother went and talked to the mother of one of the shooters 9 months after that day in April.  The mother had no idea what to say to this woman who the world was blaming for her son's actions.  Before she rang that doorbell she asked God to give her the words to say and ask.  What he said back to her was this: "Ask her about her son.  Ask her who he was." When she did that, the mother of the shooter cried as she talked about a normal boy growing up.  A boy who was just like everyone else as a child.  A boy she had no idea would turn into a murderer. 


We also talked about how a change needs to happen.  While we aren't sure what that change means for the government, we do know what that change means for us.  To be a better person period.  Not just this next week, not this just month, not even just this next year.  Forever.  We talked about our little girl and how she is going to go through so much in her life.  With all our generation has had to witness so far, I don't even want to begin to imagine what our children will see.  Because the fact of the matter is, this world will only get worse.  But we also know that if we do everything in our power to raise her right, she just might be a small change in the world that it needs. 

Ironically, just an hour after Travis and I had this conversation a dear friend texted me asking me a question I didn't know if I had the strength to answer.  I didn't know if I could say what I wanted to in a way she needed to hear it.  In a way that would not only bring comfort, but would also be accepted.  This whole event is so delicate and we have to be so careful what we say and do about it because everyone is at a different place with it.  She asked me if I ever look at my beautiful baby and feel so much love but then get a sick feeling inside thinking about how messed up this world is.  And they have to grow up in it.  How bad is it going to be for them if it's this bad for us?

Powerful questions.  Questions I have wondered about before too.  I picked up my phone and prayed as I responded.  As this is what came out:

Yes but I also know we have a God that loves us.  There is evil in the world.  There is no way around it.  God gave us free will and therefore some aren't going to chose good.  In fact it's easier to choose evil sometimes.  I know without a doubt our babies will see some awful things in their lifetimes.  But then I think about how amazing they can be.  That if we raise them to know the Lord, and do the best we can, and pray continually for them.... What if they do something great?? What if they are placed on this earth to save a soul?? Even if it's just one soul it is all worth it.  For them and for us.  What if they live their lives far more greatly for the Lord than we do?  Teach them to be good.  Teach them about Christ.  Teach them to reach out to those who hurt and are the outcasts.  Teach them to stand up for someone who is bullied.  Do that and it will all be worth it.  But yes....when I'm rocking Maci to sleep I do think about it.  But then God meets me in that place and gives me reassurance that it will be ok.

 Sadly we know 1 thing about all of the shooters in these cases.  They were different.  Their classmates called them weird.  Does them being the 'outcast' make any of this ok?? Of course not.  What they did is wrong.  But I want my kids to do everything in their power to make sure no kid feels alone or weird.  Bullying has become a normal in our country.  We have brushed it off as kids being kids.  In the past year I think we have finally started to at least try to wake up and realize it needs to change.

Yes change needs to happen in this country.  Does it need to come from the government? I don't know that answer.  The only answer I do know is that we need to change.  Change how we act and feel.  Teach your kids to do good.  Teach them to reach out to others.  Teach them to stand up for those that are the 'outcasts'.  

I'm going to leave you with a link my mom sent me this morning.  A devotional she gets daily through her email; it talks about how to pray for the mommies of those that lost a child last Friday.  Continue to pray for them daily friends, for as long as you can.  Because once the media gets tired of the story, they are still left with the pain of it. 

How to pray for the families of Sandy Hook


Merry Christmas friends.  Make the most of it and show the world the love of Jesus. :)

~Chrissy
 

 

Can you Imagine?

As mother's we've all felt it.  That moment when your baby is handed to you for the first time.  That moment when time stands still and all you can see is this precious face staring back at you.  That moment when your heart swells with more joy and love than you ever thought was possible.  A love that is totally unlike anything you've ever experienced in your whole time on this earth.  A love that is 100% indescribable.  We then get the great joy of watching this little person experience everything for the first time.  The first smile, the first tooth, the first crawl, the first boo-boo, the first word, the first step....all of it.  Which brings us a whole new level of pride knowing we are helping shape this little life into something great.  But can you imagine if that little life was going to grow up to be something far bigger and greater than you could have ever dreamed? Can you imagine if that little life you carried in you for 9 months, the life you have kept safe and sound, would grow up to save the world? That that little life was actually the Son of God??  Can you even wrap your head around how that would feel??  Can you imagine....

Last night I had the privilege of attending our Women's Christmas Event at our church. The speaker was incredible in my book.  She really made me think of the Christmas Story in a way I had even looked at it before.  The entire message was on promises and how our loving God fulfilled His promise on the first Christmas by sending His Son Jesus to be born.  There was one part of the message though that really stirred something up in me.  She talked about sweet young Mary and how Mary gave birth to Jesus.  Yes of course, nothing new there, I've always known that.  Yet the speaker talking about imaging how Mary felt feeling that little boy kick inside of her and know that He was the Son of God.  That is something I honestly never truly thought about before.  Perhaps it's because this is my very first Christmas with a baby of my own.  A baby I felt kick and hiccup inside of me.  A baby that I have got to witness some incredible firsts with.  A baby that I have an indescribable love for.

All morning long as I have been doing everyday mom stuff I have been thinking of Mary and how she did all of this stuff with Jesus Christ.  She gave Him breakfast every morning, kissed His knees when He fell down, giggled with Him as they played, rocked that sweet baby boy to sleep.....All of those things us mothers do, she got to do those with JESUS.  Can you imagine?? I still can't even wrap my head around it, how on earth did a girl around the age of 13 wrap her head around it.  To be honest, it would have scared me to death if someone had told me I would be carrying and giving birth to the Son of God.  I don't know if I could have said "Yes Lord. Use me."  I don't know if I would have had enough faith to completely surrender in that way.  But Mary did, God knew she would; that's why He chose her and not me.

Last year around this time I bought a WOW Christmas CD.  There was 1 song on there that I just totally fell in love with.  Loved it and played it over and over again.  This morning as I had that same CD in that song came on.  Still so in love with it but this time as I was listening to it, I truly listened to every word and got a whole new meaning out of it.  Probably my all time favorite Christmas song now.     

Mary stepped out in faith and let God use her however He needed to.  She got to raise a precious baby boy that she didn't know how long would be here on earth.  She got to raise the Son of God.  Just makes me stand back in awe and wonder.  My prayer this Christmas is not only that God will help me be the best mother I can be to our sweet Maci but that He will use me in whatever way He needs to.  And if it's something so big I can't wrap my head around it....I pray He gives me the strength I need to say "Yes Lord. Use me"


Merry Christmas to all.  Remember the true meaning of Christmas.  Remember that sweet baby born in a manger.  :)

~Chrissy

All I Ever Needed....

Last night I finally started on a pinterest project I've been waiting patiently for weeks to find the time to do.  I'm using canvas' and putting the lyrics to the song we danced our first dance to as husband and wife on them.

(The above photo is in the early stages of me starting on it so please forgive the bubbles :) )

While I was looking up the song lyrics I was trying to go back and remember why on earth that was our song; which is "All I Ever Needed" by Bret Michaels.  For the life of me I honestly could not remember why it was.  We obviously really liked the song otherwise we wouldn't have chose it, but I couldn't think of a super sentimental reason why we did.  As I was typing up the lyrics though something hit me.  This song is totally and completely 100% us at the moment.  I honestly don't think I could have chose a better song to describe the past 3 1/2 years of our marriage.  I won't bore you with the lyrics to the whole song, but here is the chorus:

We didn't need fortune we didn't need fame
Just a little shelter from the rain
Your hand to hold on to
When times got tough you pulled me through
We didn't need a castle made of stone
Just you there as I grow old
Your heart to hold on to
All I ever needed was you

 

Now of course when you first see those lyrics and hear them as a 21 year old totally head over heels in love with the man of her dreams you definitely want those words to be true.  You like to think you don't need fortune or a castle for your marriage to last but honestly how true is that of marriages in todays world? So many of our generation is getting married on the feeling of love but honest to goodness doesn't know or think that it involves a lot of work every day at it.  Or depending on how they were raised think that hey, if it doesn't work I can always get divorced.  I can think of a few people I know that got married in their early twenties and before they even hit 30 they were divorced.  It breaks my heart how easily a marriage is thrown away sometimes.  I don't believe that all of the sudden you can wake up one day and decide you don't love the person you are waking up next to anymore.  I do believe that if the marriage isn't given the attention it needs and deserves that couples will eventually lose hope that things will ever be the same again.  

Travis and I obviously have not been marriage a long time.  We haven't even hit the 5 year mark yet, but believe me when I say we have definitely hit some bumps in the road.  As I looked over this song once again and looked back to the day when I was all dolled up and at my best dancing with a sparkle in my eye for a man I could now call mine, I thought of all we have done in our short 3 1/2 years of marriage.  I especially thought of all that happened in the past 11 months.  In the past 11 months we had a beautiful baby girl and I chose to quit my steady income job.  Those 2 things alone put a stress on a marriage.  Not only have we had to figure out how we were gonna live on a low budget, but we've also had to figure out how to find time for this whole marriage thing when there is a little girl that badly needs our attention more.  We went through the stage of thinking our house is just way too small for our family of 3, we've had stresses with money every now and then, and we've of course had some disagreements every now and then but you know what? As I was looking over those lyrics again it all hit me at once.  May sound odd but it was like the Lord needed me to do this project to remember something.  We don't need all the money in the world, we don't need a big castle.  All we need is each and to know that no matter what comes at us, I will be by Trav's side to help him through it and he will do the same for me.  We can live in this house for as long as it takes and be busting at the seams, and as long as our kids feel the love busting at the seams as well that's OK. 

Therefore I am so extremely excited to get this project done and to display this reminder proudly in our bedroom.  I would even encourage the rest of you to do the same.  Doesn't have to be the same project of course, but do something visual that you will see everyday to remind you of those little things.  Remind you that as a husband and wife you can face anything that comes at you.  But above all, also remember that Christ also needs to be involved. :) 

-Chrissy

(As a side note, I'm pretty pumped Travis and I are taking the time to go on a little getaway by ourselves without the little one.  Friday just can't come soon enough!)

Sweet memories that last forever...

A month ago tomorrow my sweet Grandma Gerri left this earthly world and went to go 'dancing with Jesus'.  It's a very surreal feeling.  In some sense it feels like just yesterday she was holding Maci, smiling and saying sometimes off the wall things to us.  And then in another sense it feels as if it was such a long time ago that we had to say good-bye to her.  Honestly it probably feels like such a long time ago because let's face it, in today's world life quickly moves on.  There is a house to care for, children to keep in line, money to be made, events to plan, and just the plain old everyday fast paced life our generation has grown accustomed to.  While the family continues to mourn in the privacy of their home, friends and family move on and forget that one might still be hurting. 

As Christians we know that there is a much better life after our time here on earth, but that doesn't take away the fact that someone we loved and shared our lives with has left us.  We will never get to hug them, kiss them, tell them we love them, call them up on the phone ever again in this world.  Fact of the matter is, losing someone, even when you believe you will see them again in heaven, still hurts. 

Every week, at least once, I have thought back to a question the pastor had asked our family before the funeral procession.  He looked out at us and asked, "Would anyone like to speak at all?"  We all just kinda looked around blankly and shook our heads no. Even though I am not one to get up and speak in front of a crowd, I'm still a little regretful that I didn't get up and say yes.  Maybe I would have stepped up to the plate had he not asked 5 minutes before we all  had to walk in behind our beloved Mom's/Grandmother's casket.

The funeral was as wonderful as a funeral can be.  But there were also people there I had not met. Extended family members that lived elsewhere and we weren't close with.  Some that maybe hadn't seen Grandma for awhile.  They knew of course how much Grandma obviously had been loved by us, but I wanted them to hear the stories of what she meant to us. 

I have thought about what I would have said many times in the past month.  Obviously can't go back and redo any of it.  If I could, I would go further back so that I could hold my last hug with Grandma a little longer and a little tighter.  I have no idea why the words keep going through my mind.  Maybe I just need to say it for my own personal reasons or who knows maybe there is a different reason I can't see right now. 

My grandmother was a strong, beautiful, feisty, loving woman.  She said what was on her mind and didn't care who heard.  There are many times I remember hearing words come out of her mouth that shocked me and I would say, "GRANDMA!".  She would look at me and say, "Well it's MY opinion, I can say it if I want."  Those times bring a smile to my face now, because it was who she was and she didn't change for anybody.  :)  The days before she died beloved memories I had with her would come to my mind.  The Friday nights I would spend over at her house and she would lay in bed scratching my back with her long painted fingernails until I fell asleep; late nights staying up watching "I Love Lucy" on Nick at Nite; all the Christmas' that her living room was filled with all of us crammed into the living room to see what she bought us.  The most memorable time for me was one day I was at her old house on Rice Street and we decided to make mac 'n cheese for lunch.  I can't remember how old I was but I must have been pretty little because I remember having to stand on a stool to stir the noodles for her.  I must have made the wrong move because it ended in my arm getting burned from my elbow to my wrist.  Grandma had no idea what to do and in some crazy thought, she decided it was best to bring me into Lewis Drug and ask the pharmacist what to do with it. :) Good intentions of course.

Whether it was a day spent with her granddaughter catching butterflies or Grandma giving her grandson some money to run across the street to buy some candy at the Liquor store she created a lasting impression on all of her family.  She raised 4 wonderful children, including a set of triplets during a time when triplets were completely uncommon. She spent hours on the phone with her daughter-in-law when us kids were just little.  She loved my husband dearly and often told me how handsome he was.  She loved my baby girl and all of her great-grandchildren deeply.

She packed a lot of life and a lot of love into her 86 years on this earth.  Her life was greatly intertwined with ours and the bottom line is, our lives will not be the same with her gone.  We still miss her and we of course still love her, but we have hope and joy in knowing this isn't good-bye.  Grandma we will see you again.  Just keep dancing with Jesus until we get there, just make sure to save a dance for us. :)

 

The Family who loved Geraldine Grimlie 

(minus Maci of course)

I {insert name} take thee....

This past weekend I got to stand up at the altar with a sweet friend from middle school as she married her prince charming. :) It very much was a magical day and I must say she looked just like a princess out of a fairy tale.  I do admit it was a very surreal experience.  As I saw her walking down that aisle images of us sitting in the bleachers in our middle school gym during volleyball practice and laughing with friends in our high school ad room flashed through my mind.  We are all definitely growing up and those years are obviously behind us.  It is such an awesome feeling though, knowing how head over heels in love she is and how this man is helping make all her dreams come true. 

The Pastor shared a message that hit me in a way I didn't think it would.  Usually when you go to a wedding, at least the ones I have been to, the Pastor shares stories he has about the couple or takes some scripture and creates a very generic message that could be related to anyone really.  But this message was one I was clinging to every word of.  I will try to give a good shorten version of it, but either way the message is pretty dang good.

The story involved a married couple that had decided to get all dressed up in their wedding attire and take a photograph every year on their anniversary.  On their 5th wedding anniversary the couple was all ready to take the photograph and this year they were struggling financially.  Bills were hard to pay, one of their kids was having medical problems, the furniture was old and worn, therefore they couldn't hire a professional photographer to take this years photo.  As they were getting ready to take the photograph they ended up holding hands and repeating their vows all over again.  While they were saying those promises to each other, the words for richer or for poorer flashed in their minds along with those bills they have laying on the table. 

At 15 years, they were better financially, but before the photographer arrived the couple got into a fight and harsh words were said.  Knowing the photographer had already left the studio, the couple went up to the attic, got out those wedding clothes, and put them on.  When the photographer arrived, the couple wasn't into it.  As they were getting posed into position, the couple got caught up in the moment and as they held hands started saying those promises to each other yet again.  This time the words for better or worse flashed in their minds along with the image of the fight just a few moments prior. 

Flash forward yet again to 47 years of marriage.  The couple has aged considerably.  The wife suffering from arthritis, ect.  The wedding dress has yellowed and the husband's suit doesn't fit like it used to.  As they got into position again and held hands those promises came from their lips and as they held hands, the husband felt his wife's knobby fingers and the words in sickness and in health flashed in his mind. 

As I stood there and took in that story, not only did I think about all the beautiful years Brian & Cari will have together and all the tough times they will also experience, but I also thought about how those same vows can also relate to our relationship with Jesus.  It is so very easy to love and worship the Lord when things are going 'our' way, but yet when trouble hits we are so quick to get angry at God for letting this happen to us.  We love Him and obey Him so why on earth would He do this to us?? 

I am very much guilty of this.  When things have gotten really tough I will be the first to admit that I have sat on my bed and yelled at God wondering how could You?? How could You do this to me?? Have I not obeyed you? Have I not loved  You enough? Why would you leave me? 

The thing is we are called to love God for better OR for worse; for richer OR poorer; in sickness AND health.  The only difference is that instead of at the end saying til death do us part, we should be saying forever and ever amen. 

Therefore I challenge all of us to go to the Lord tonight and give Him our solemn vow:

I, Christine Petty, take thee Jesus Christ to be my Savior,

to love & to cherish from this day forward.

For better or worse,

for richer or poorer,

in sickness and health.

Forever and ever amen

It may not be easy but I think we all know how worth it it will be in the end :)

-Chrissy 

 

What God wants...

Well here we go....

For some reason the past several months my mind has randomly gone to blogging.  I've always done some blogs here and there for clients but never anything too personal.  Nothing ever real on my thoughts or things that are weighing on my heart. But lately, probably since the beginning of summer every once in a while the idea of sitting down at the computer and writing out what is on my mind at that moment seemed so unbelievably tempting.  I have often thought it was just because now all the sudden I'm noticing blogging is the new 'in' thing.  I've got a few more friends that do it and if I'm being completely honest I've always been a tad jealous of their talent.  Sitting down and writing out things on your mind and heart is one thing but to sit down, write it all out and then hit the 'post' button so the world can see? Man, I truly believe that takes guts and talent.  Once those thoughts are out there they are totally out there.  Can't take them back and for sure can't erase them from any one's mind who read what you posted.

Therefore anytime the longing to want to try it entered my mind I just brushed it off.  Thoughts like, "Oh they are way better at it than I would ever be" and "I could never do that, I would never say anything of any importance to anyone" would be in my head resulting in my of course not thinking about it again for quite some time.  Yet just because I wasn't thinking about it, I really don't think it ever left my mind.

Today Maci, my daughter, and I went for a beautiful afternoon fall walk.  It was absolutely gorgeous out and I just couldn't resist taking her for a stroll in her stroller and take some time to just enjoy it.  Enjoy the leaves falling, enjoy the little bit of the last warmth from the sun, enjoy the peace and somewhat quiet that is outside.  (Of course there are noises, like cars and kids playing, but to me that is still quiet and peaceful.  When you are indoors a person always tends to have the T.V. on or music, it's never the same quiet that comes from the outdoors.)

The past few weeks have been incredibly hard on our family.  We have had so much going on and so much heartache, that I was so thankful for that walk.  I took that time to just reflect on all that God had done and just spend time with Him.  And of course in the middle of that this whole 'silly' blogging thing came back into my mind.  Really? Really??  I'm having this nice enjoyable walk and THAT enters my mind?? I seriously thought maybe I was going crazy and I just wasn't focusing on God for some reason.  But then I began to wonder....is God telling me something?? Is He trying to tell me that this is part of His plan for me right now?? Is He wanting me to do it for some reason??

As I began to think about that more seriously and question it, I started of course with my same responses.  "I can't do it.  Nothing I could ever write will ever be important to anyone.  No one is going to want to read it.  I'm not good enough"  And then I felt that small tug at my heart and heard that soft voice in my head.  "Daughter, someone needs to hear it.  Someone needs to hear what you have to say.  Someone just might need to know you are going through what they are.  Even if it's just one person it IS worth it."  

Alright let's face it, He's right.  Who can argue with God anyway?? He always has our best interest in mind, and He always ends up being right, even if we don't see it right away.

That original voice in my head, that voice screaming "I can't do it and I won't", well folks I firmly believe that's the devil.  Whenever God tries to tell us something He wants from us, we best believe that soon to follow is the devil feeding us lies and telling us we can't.

So with this very first post....I encourage us all to listen to what God wants of us and to STOP listening to the lies Satan wants us to believe.  Because with God on our side....we can do ANYTHING. 

"Jesus looked at them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but with God ALL things are POSSIBLE"
-Matthew 19:26

~Chrissy :)